My dumb car

I will probably update this with a photo later, but I can't find the one I'm looking for.

So anyway, I drive a 2001 Plymouth Neon. Manual transmission. It has behaved fairly well since I got it. Bought it for $900 from a friend in 2009 I think. It was cheap because it needed some repairs. My previous car was a 1992 Toyota corolla, and it died.

Current car has needed a bit of work on the brakes and repair on the air conditioning when I got it. Only big repairs lately is replacing some cable in August and replacing the shifter assembly a few weeks back. To me, a few repairs are ok because I'm still spending less than if I bought a new car. One of my current dreams though is to have a job that lets me afford a car payment.

There is one problem with it that I am not sure how to fix. Well, I can't fix it, and I'm not sure who could. A year or so ago I went to dinner with a couple friends (the 2 vampires actually because they were speaking then) at a mexican restaurant. It has a parking lot that is way too small for the number of customers, so people park in the grass. I gave in and parked in the grass. It was muddy so this was in general a bad idea.

Well, I go to leave and manage to get through the mud backing out. However, there was a ledge (not sure that's the right word) of concrete at the edge of the parking lot. The concrete was a few inches higher than the mud, but it didn't seem that bad. I drive over it, and I could tell it was worse than I thought. My car started making a weird noise. I actually stopped on the way home to make sure my bumper was ok. It was, so I couldn't figure out the problem.

The next day, I go to look at it again. It seems the concrete bent some metal/plastic near the tires. There was plastic actually touching the tire, hence the noise. I emailed my dad this, and he and my mom came out later. I said we should cut the plastic piece because it isn't essential to anything. Eventually, my dad agreed with this (after my mom said it too). So they cut the plastic piece that was touching the tire.

The issue is that the metal is still bent, and that we couldn't fix. It does not actually touch the tire, but depending on how the wheels are turned, it comes close.

Well, since then I have relaxed and not worried about it. Recently, I looked and noticed my front tires look pretty worn. It's even on both sides, so it's just normal wear. I drive a lot, so my tires probably need to be replaced more than usual. I realized it was bad a month or so ago because I was driving to a meeting, and it was raining. At one stoplight, I went to go and my tires spun. The way they do if the car can't get enough traction to move. This happened again later driving to my sponsor's house because there's a fairly steep little hill going there.

I have the money for a pair of new tires. That is not a big problem. However, I am not sure the tire shop will replace them with the metal nearly touching. They may not believe that it's ok. They may not want to then be responsible if that does mess up the tire. I am not sure how to address the issue.

Today it is raining. Not hard, but the roads are wet. This makes me very nervous. I went to my sponsor's house after a meeting.. it was weird. Another person was going to go over there to put her clothes in the dryer with some Febreze to get the smoke smell out. My sponsor was supposed to take her daughter to some party, so she mentioned I could go over to open the house since I have a key. I agree to do this. I get there and my sponsor hasn't left yet, so I wasn't needed. I hung out anyway.

Well, a bit after 5 my sponsor gets a call from someone needing a ride to the 6pm meeting. She wasn't feeling well, so she asked me. My car is a mess, which is the excuse I gave. Mostly, I am scared driving my car on wet roads. I am scared the tires will skid when I try to stop. I am simultaneously scared to have someone in the car who might get hurt and ashamed of my shitty tires. I'm also ashamed of my fear. I feel like a bitch now... I did mention the tires after my sponsor got off the phone. I did not express my fear. I did not mention that I am ok with me dying in a car wreck, but I am not ok risking having a passenger in the car. I am not ok with a passenger seeing me panic when the tires spin. I am also not ok with someone hearing the weird noise my car makes that I can't figure out. That doesn't concern me as far as safety, but it does make me feel like my car is shitty.

So I am writing this because I feel guilty. I could have given the person a ride. Just between car problems and social anxiety, I couldn't. Soon I will try replacing the tires. If the place won't do it, I could either make them put the spare on and give me the tire to put on myself. I could switch that front tire for a back tire (they always put the new ones on the back) and either explain or not explain why. They wouldn't have to deal with the problem. My dad's opinion (I know so little about cars that I run things by him) is to try to buy the new ones and if they refuse we'll deal with switching cars. I just hate feeling like a bitch or feeling lazy for not giving the person a ride. My car is just something I have a lot of fear and shame about.