I survived week 1. I was in a meeting (AA) earlier and thinking of when they talk about HALT. Hungry Angry Lonely Tired.. that sums up this week. Hungry because I have enjoyed claiming I'm not hungry when really I just didn't want to eat. Angry so many times over disagreements with my supervisor (the girl I know from school). A lot has been things she really didn't explain clearly. I fully understand that I misunderstood, but I'm still frustrated at how she explained things. I also am very angry that in my 1st week I became responsible for single handedly become responsible for taking inventory for the lab I work in (genetics) but not for the other lab (toxicology) that I know absolutely nothing about.

The task keeps expanding.. it was one lab then the other. It was count everything. Then include whether it was a bottle or a box or whatever. Then it was the volume of said box or bottle. Then the company it came from and catalog number.. this meant going back and looking at everything again. Plus, this stuff is mostly frozen, so I can only do so much before it becomes a problem to open the freezer again.

Lonely.... yesterday is a good example. In the morning she gave me a timeline for my assignments. Monday I have training for some new equipment. Tuesday the inventory for everything is due. Then yesterday I was required to write up the protocol(procedure) for a lab experiment. I had written the basic procedure already. Because this lab deals with actual patient samples, everything must official.. so I have to write a procedure that will be approved by my boss and my boss's boss and etc

To make this make sense.. the experiment basically involves: making chemicals used to measure DNA, prepare some samples used as comparison (ones we know the exact concentration of), and then measuring concentration of everything.

I know how to make the chemicals and the samples. For 2 days I made it clear I did not know how to use the equipment used to measure concentration. I write up the rest based on an example she gave me. I mention during the day that I needed help. At 5:30 (I came in at 8:30) she's in a meeting, I text her to ask if she wants me to stay and finish or just email her what I had done. She says I can stay or leave. I text that I need her help to finish. I wait around for a few minutes and then start preparing the email. I text her I'm sending it. She texts we can forget the last part for now and says thanks... I think in her head this was a realistic task but it really wasn't. I had never done this experiment before. I had never written this type of document before.. and I should NOT have had to sit alone most of the day to write this.

I don't want to say anything because I don't want her to think I can't do this. I don't want to say she's being unreasonable.. I just want things to get better