Plan? Plans?

So I have a couple possible plans for this whole sobriety thing.
I talked to my friend, and she and I both agree treatment would be best. Preferably longer term (months-year). I've known her for over 10 years, so she's seen me through depression, cutting, bulimia, and alcoholism. I've seen her through some things too. She's one of the handful of people that understand that all the addictions served the same purpose. Self medication for everything else.

I even mentioned not wanting to tell my parents. She says they should want to know since I am their daughter, but she is also someone who knows about me and my parents. When I was in middle/high school, my friends thought my parents were perfect. They were nice and funny. They also had major communication issues and passive aggressive tendencies, and they were always sure I was the only one sick. They don't get it being a family problem or that they contributed (not caused) to a lot of it.

Since then I have done some research and thought a lot.

I found a couple potential treatment centers. I am not thinking long term now. I mentioned to her that I may consider moving into a sober living facility when my lease is up in November. I don't know if everywhere has this concept.. it's like a halfway house. A group home or apartment complex for recovering alcoholics/addicts. Usually with counseling and drug testing and a supportive environment.

I read about places online, but I was at my parents' house so couldn't really call. I will reevaluate tomorrow and maybe call some. I'm looking for 2-4 weeks detox plus inpatient. I'm looking for somewhere that 1. takes my insurance 2. will work with me on paying the rest (insurance pays 80%) since I'm unemployed. It's become too overwhelming to research much more.


The other plan that I am leaning toward, and it may not be a good plan. I will quit drinking and detox at home.. But
1. I will take my detox medication. I am researching dosage and I am looking at normal tapering protocol
2. I will enlist at least 1 person to text me (or I'll text them) at regular intervals.
Reasoning- if I don't answer or text, they can call. If I don't answer they can maybe decide to call an ambulance. If I answer, they can make sure I sound coherent. No paranoia. No hallucinations. Nothing like that.
3. I will enlist at least go to AA once a day. I am considering enlisting someone to pick me up and take me. That way I have to go.
I am considering asking one of the women I trust to keep my car keys for now so I can't 1. get liquor 2. drive while disoriented/hallucinating whatever. This comes down to how much I trust them. If I do this, I want it to be someone nearby who can pick me up if I absolutely need something.


This is all a bit complicated by the fact that my therapist will be out of town this week. I should probably call and run things by her, but I feel like the more people involved the scarier it gets. I could see my psychiatrist about the home detox. I am unsure if he'd agree. I guess maybe I can be considered a severe alcoholic? at this point. If you're reading this, feel free to weigh in. I'm at at least 15 shots of vodka a day. I told my friend that since none of us really drank in college, I don't have a lot to compare this to.

I still have some steps to take. I probably won't quit tomorrow. I am debating tapering down a bit, which might make it less dangerous. I should also (especially if giving away my keys) stock up on food, gatorade, and anything for being sick. I have read stuff about what to do. High protein, high fat diet. Lots of fluids. Vitamins. Low caffeine. Probably ice packs for sweats. I've got anti-nausea meds both prescription and over the counter. I hoarded the prescription ones. I had a stomach bug that lasted a day, but my doctor wrote it for 30 pills (yay!)

This is all WAY too much. Too many options too many things to prepare too many people to talk to. I hate phone conversations. The at home route is my preference, but I do know I need to be in contact with people. It may mean leaving my apartment unlocked and sleeping on the couch, so someone can come in and check on me if I don't respond to calls/ texts. I have never had DTs or anything severe, just high blood pressure, but the tremors are embarrassing at this point. I saw my parents today and tried so hard to will my hands to be still (doesn't work).

So if you read this, feel free to weigh in. I am not by any means making anyone responsible for this decision, but opinions and support are welcome