Work was awful. So much complaining. My coworkers were all discussing how unfair everything is and how we're mistreated. I didn't participate. I sat in another room for some of it. I did briefly complain about something my supervisor did.. basically he started his qc cases late and then messaged me he probably wasn't going to finish them. That means we couldn't do the pull of unclosed cases. I already knew that it was ridiculously long. I basically responded with ok because I was too angry to manage more than a one word response.
One of the times I walked back into the room during the complaining, I started seeing spots.. or stars.. or I normally would describe them as flies made of light because they remind me of fruit flies. It's happened before after I purged. I was just standing still. I was legitimately concerned because I think I've read somewhere that it can happen before a seizure and I already had tremors and other withdrawal symptoms. I also kept feeling like there were bugs on me. All of this is probably why I was frustrated with my coworkers. It's hard to be patient with people while feeling like shit. I couldn't really tell anyone what was going on though I think they were aware I was unhappy.
I don't know how to make this complaining stop. I considered telling the manager but I don't want them to get in trouble. Even if I didn't say who said what, she could get upset.
In other news, I didn't go to the liquor store today, and they're closed Sunday. I could still buy alcohol, but I am going to try not to. I can at least try. I actually didn't finish the vodka left. I think I had 12 shots? And dumped the rest. I started thinking I could drink the leftover tomorrow, but that just prolongs the drinking. I am torn about the idea of not drinking. I know drinking less will help? So I will see what happens
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